I love this little boy...

Nephew Jesse, 8.5 months old.

Office

I was down in the Tron again this week. I've twisted their advertising slogan from, "Hamilton, City of the Future." To, "Hamilton, City of MY Future!" ... I'm moving to Hamilton, madness.


Of all the things a desk could have written on it my new one says 'Hamilton'... just there as a constant reminder of where I am. I'd have thought something like 'Word of Life' might be a little more appropriate?! :P


This is the outside view of our little office. It's cute. And in this shot all the graffiti is hidden. No jokes.... The joys of being on the corner of a pretty busy road. Also note the clear blue skies in the background! "B-E-A-utiful!" To quote my friend Yun.

A book?

P. Mark at 24 has written a book.

I've read it and feel inspired.

I could write a book.

There are chapter titles swimming round in my head already!

Humble

That's my word for the day.

I had to stand up in church this morning and do something that most people never have to do. I had to ask people to consider supporting me financially next year. It's really a bizarre thought, that people would donate money so that I can afford to live. That they would even give me money full stop. It's humbling to say the least.

I mean, it's so awesome and so encouraging that people believe in the work I'll be doing. I am so grateful to these people. I'm blessed.

I sense too more of a responsibility living this way, by faith, I mean. The fact that I'll be relying on so many people, means that they have a vested interest in what I'm doing. I'll be accountable to many more people than in a regular job. I have to act even more responsibly than normal with how I spend money. I have a feeling I'm going to learn anew he value of what I have. It is at the same time exciting to think that I will be sharing with so many people the joy of serving the Lord in this way, with Word of Life.

Tim was praying during the service this morning too for our new government and things and he quoted this passage from 2 Chronicles 7:14. It is when the LORD appeared to Solomon after the temple had been dedicated. It's an amazing promise spoken right out of the LORD's mouth. It's a matter of the people, or us today, being humble before the LORD, the creator of the heavens. In our humility and seeking of the LORD there he will be. Ready to forgive and to heal.

"If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear them from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land."

Ever felt like this...?

Do you ever feel completely dry and cracked? Like there is just nothing left inside you to give? Barren. Like no matter what anyone does for you or says to you, it will never be enough to make the cracks go away? To smooth the roughness? To make you less fragile, so you won't crumble at the first sign of trouble? Sometimes I feel like this. Like anything positive I hear or do just slips away through the cracks. It's so hard to give when life is like this. It can seem like things are too far gone at this point. That nothing could heal the cracks and restore life to the soul.


But Jesus came to give life.


Slowly but surely, life with Jesus starts to bring change. The dust starts to clear. It might be hard to recognise at first but sure enough the changes come. Jesus' promises start to wash over a dry and cracked soul and bring relief. Can you see the ground becoming less harsh? Time in God's Word has started a change, a softening. The cracks are still there, but less defined. Things aren't slipping through them as easily anymore. Suddenly giving to people doesn't feel as draining, it still isn't easy, but it's definately easier.

But Jesus came to give life.

See now the cracks are gone. Things are barren and dry no longer. The soul has been saturated and lives again. With this life there is joy. And hope. And peace. And grace. This life is found in Jesus. He can take away the pain of a dry and barren spirit and give you life again.

Ezekiel 36:26

"I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh."

Worry wart...

I feel like blogging... I have so much other stuff to do though. I just feel there is something in my head that I need to get out. I just don't know where to start though. Sometimes too I question the appropriatness of what I blog. I'd hate to say something here that offends or over steps the mark or whatever. But at the same time I'm not even sure who reads it. And then that makes me think why I even bother with this, why not keep a regular old journal?

*sigh*

My big struggle at the moment is having expectations of people. It's not fair of me to have any sort of expectation about how people behave or whatever. It just isn't my right. However, when you are friends with people who profess certain things it naturally lends to a particular way of thinking about them. It's this perhaps unfair 'boxing' of them that leads to the disappointment that comes when they do something outside of the box.

Hmm, I just said that I'm struggling with expectations I have of people. I think it's actually that I'm more worried about the expectations that have naturally arisen because of the nature of our friendship, looking like a judgement on them or their actions. This isn't the case at all. What people get up to is none of my business. Sometimes I'd rather not know, what is it that people say all too often, "Ignorance is bliss." For me in the situation I'm in now, this would definately be the case. Not knowing would save me the trouble of all this worry.

I over think stuff all the time. I'm worried now that the actions of a friend are really just the signs of something deeper troubling them. I worry cause I care and I'm disappointed because I care. I feel guilty because I wonder if I could have changed the situation.

This worry brings me to another problem!!! The fact that I'm worrying at all! I shouldn't be and I know that. I need to lose this save the world mentality. I need to stop being so naive! Stuff happens. Get over it, Sarah.